Lunchtime Madness

So we had a training day at work today - which of course meant HALF-DAY!!!!!

One of the guys I trained last year was there, and I never get to see my friend, so we went to lunch together. Him, me, the two regulars Doug and Eeyore (a nickname - but trust me if you met the guy it fits) and Ron (who is the coolest guy I've ever met...he's like 1950s cool and he speaks French...travels to France, etc. - so really he's 1950s French cool - which let's face it, is the coolest ever). Alright, so we're all getting ready to go to lunch, when the girl across the hall from me asks if she can go. (To protect the innocent we'll call her El Gato as we went out for Mexican and I assigned everyone a Mexican nickname and that was her nickname).

Now no one wanted her to go, as she is very, very, very annoying. But, being the nice guy that I am - I told them, I can't not invite her now that she's asked. (I know I'm a passive aggressive wimp). So I told her she could go, and this is what happened...

1. She asks if we really want her to go, or if I just feel guilty for her inviting herself. I then have to convince her she's loved. (Annoying)

2. She insists we all ride with her, which was fine with me - saves on gas, saves the environment, etc. But the whole ride she talks LOUDLY about herself the whole time (Very annoying)

3. We get there and all she wants to do is tell all of us why Obama is evil and why the liberals are ruining America (Are you f**king kidding me!!!!) - (Not just annoying, but also kinda stupid)

4. So - and this should give you an idea of what we had to deal with. I try to lighten the mood and change the subject by giving everyone Mexican nicknames - My mente Nathan was El Chaqueta, Doug - El Pollo Loco, Eeyore was - El Pantalones, Ron was - El Matador and I was El Toro Diablo and Annoying Girl was El Gato. She then proceeds to LOUDLY ask as we sit in the restaurant, "WHY IS MY NICKNAME 'PUSSY'!" Of course no one responds (as we are all passive aggressive men) which causes her to keep repeating it louder and louder.

Suffice it to say the meal could have been better. The only cool part was when El Gato was lecturing us on why Fascism is so good.

El Gato - "At least Hitler made the trains run on time!"
Ron (El Matador) Said in a snide tone of voice - "Of course he did...it got the Jews out of the country faster."

Everyone laughed, except El Gato who thought he was being rude....

Clearly she missed the point.